I love being right...I think most people would agree 'being right' is an overall satisfying feeling. And I am very competitive person...I can turn just about anything into a competition. But I am not a sore loser. When I lose, I own it. And similar to embracing losing, I also embrace being wrong. And to be honest, I use failure to drive me forward. To make me a better person. It is one of the ways I think God does good through me as a sinner...
And I am sure that God, who began the good work within you, will continue His work until it is finally finished on that day when Christ Jesus comes back gain.
But it is really, really tough when you have to accept a wrong that really isn't a wrong. When you are accused but are innocent. These moments are hard for anyone to swallow...especially someone that likes to be right. I can accept being wrong when I am wrong. It's a million times harder to accept it when you know in your heart, you really aren't wrong. And I think these moments try us more than the moments when we are actually wrong. And most of the time, we fail miserably...instead fighting for that final say. Fighting to be right.
Recently, more than once, I have had to swallow being 'wrong' when I really wasn't wrong. (I am learning...when I face the same challenge over and over gain, God is trying to get my attention. It usually takes more than once for me to realize this...when will I learn?!?) And with each accusation, I have wanted the 'final say' but have remained silent (although....I have been kicking and screaming to God!!! Like I said in the previous blog...Give it to God!). As I continue to struggle with this internal battle, I had a moment of clarity. For those people super close to me, I do a lot of thinking in the shower. Some of my best creative ideas have come while washing my hair or shaving my legs. And yet again, an epiphany came with shampoo in hand. It's not about being right. It's about being. Being there. Being a witness. Being a sacrifice. And sometimes just being. But it isn't about being right. And really, it has never been about being right. It has always been about being with Jesus. And we know Jesus suffered the ultimate punishment for being accused of wrong, when He was really right. And He did so with grace, honor and peace. He didn't fight being right. He surrendered to His father.
Then Jesus shouted, "Father, I entrust my spirit into your hands." And with those words he breathed his last breath. When the captain of the Roman soldiers handling the executions saw what had happened, he praised God and said, "Surely this man was innocent."
Jesus didn't have to fight being accused a criminal. All He had to do was just be. He trusted God and the rest came full circle....and will come full circle again some day. He suffered both physically and emotionally with being accused of wrong but He didn't kick and scream out for His innocence. And at the end of the day, people just knew. People knew who He was and what He was....and He wasn't wrong. He was oh so right.
So if you struggle being accused of something you know to be a false accusation....remember to stay focus on God. On the sacrifice and the example in Jesus. Because it's not about being right. It's just about being.
Accusations, sacrifice, and silence,
Just a few reflections about everything God is teaching me in this life...a journey deeper into His purpose for my life.